Module 2 Personal Reflection: Not all who wonder are lost

There was a time in my life when wondering and questioning were not simply discouraged, they were simply not done. Wondering about topics that were believed to have already been decided was not just regarded as a massive waste of time or a momentary weakness, it was considered to be wrong. I recall a teaching which declared that a “double-minded” man is unstable, like a wave of the sea, he is blown and tossed by the wind. I remember hearing a similar cautious phrase of folksy counsel, “remember that the most dangerous place to be is in the middle of the road.”

Clearly, some believe that there are potential perils associated with wondering. There are alleged to be some terrible outcomes associated with being able to see more than one side of an issue, to ponder new possibilities, to question answers you memorized as a child before you even understood the meaning of the answers or the questions. Who knows what might happen if you wonder about issues kept tightly, protectively shut in a box or a book labeled “Nothing to wonder about here”? As has already been noted, some suggest that you might find yourself tossed to and fro in a volatile and violent riptide, or you might be hit by a car while you are meandering near the center line, rather than hugging the far left or far right side. Here is another possibility: you might learn something very important or feel something profoundly deep and meaningful. And for those who do not want you to think, to question, to push and prod and poke at what they believe to be unassailably true, the learning may be the most dangerous outcome of all.

As suggested by the title of this reflection, I no longer believe that wondering about life and death and everything that happens between those marker moments and beyond is risky business. I think it is good business, a wise and thoughtful approach that fully engages our open minds and open hearts. As I continue to advance in age, my list of wonderings also continues to grow. I find myself wanting to embrace the humility of honest inquiry rather than grasping at fragile assertions and assumptions posing as unquestionable certainty.

Not all who wonder are lost. We simply wonder. And in the process of wondering, we sometimes find ourselves and other precious treasures. I should note that the process of discovering new insights might feel a bit like an upheaval, a lurching, a shaking of what we previously believed to be unshakable. It can be unsettling, until things settle again. But I really don’t think you will have to dodge much traffic along the way. Though some may honk at you when they fear their right of way may not be the only right way, generally the path of those who wonder is not a well-traveled road.